Introduction

Wow!! So, this is new... I am creating this blog to document our journey to have more children. It is a very sensitive subject, and most people that we know in real life do not know of our recent struggles. It makes me feel good to be able to say everything here, if even just to get it off my chest. Lets start with our background....well, my husband and I met in May 2002 at a bar (although our children will think we met at a library!!) I feel as if it was love at first sight!! I knew there was something about him....something I wanted in my life forever. We were married a little over 3 years later in June of 2005.

My whole life I had "womanly" problems, and was told at the ripe age of 13 that I may not ever be able to have children, but failed to ask more questions at that point in time (and really, what 13 year old would?!?!). I was put on birth control pills (BCP) to keep my cycles regular and to actually have cycles. I continued on that BCP until March 2006. We wanted to start our family!!! Easy right, no, but I guess it kinda was.... I went off the BCP in March, and didn't get my period until I took some Provera to induce it. I then started on Clomid!! I took my first Clomid pill on May 15th, 2006, and on June 8th, 2008, much to our surprise, we got a positive pregnancy test!!! (Actually, 8 positive tests because I couldn't believe the first seven!!!) Wow!! I was pregnant!!! I truley did not expect it to hapen so quickly and easily, but still thank God every day that it did!!

I had a rather uneventful pregnancy, well of course except for my cyst. Now, before we get too far, let me tell you that the reason I was told I would have troubles concieving was because I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS or PCOD). Basically, my hormones are all out-of-whack and I make loads of timy cysts on my ovaries that inhibit ovulation. But, that Clomid stuff was great!! I not only ovulated, but I got pregnant....firt try!!! OK, back to my pregnancy: I had what started out as a corpous leutem cyst on my right ovary. Now, these type of cysts are nessecary in the beginning of every pregnancy. This cyst secretes the hormones necessary to maintain the pregnancy until the end of the first trimester when the placenta is functioning for this. Once the placenta takes over, the cyst is supposed to shrink away to nothing. Not mine...I think mine was possessed!!! Instead of shrinking, mine grew....and grew, and grew, and grew!! Now, luckily I was not having any pains from this cyst throught my pregnancy, but by the time I hit 37 weeks, I was in pain. The pain started off as an uncomfortable feeling, which overnight turned into sharp, stabbing pains. My doctor sent me to the hospital, and we had to get the baby out before any permanent damage was done to me. Our daughter was born at 37 weeks 1 day, weighing 5#6oz. I had to have a C-Section, and at which time the doctor excised my grapefruit sized cyst.

Wow!!! Motherhood is wonderful!! I have a beautiful daughter, who I love more and more with every passing day (even though she is currently undergoing the "terrible two's"). How Blessed are we!!! Well, 6 months after delicery, that rogue cyst came back!!! YUCK!!!! So, I had to have another surgery, and unfortunatley, the cyst had caused my right fallopian tube to lose its blood flow, and the necrotic tissue had to be removed. I lost a tube, but I still had another, and I still had both of my ovaries. The persistant cyst came AGAIN in January of 2008, but ruptured on its own while I was in the ER, so no surgery was necessary. Knock on wood, no more huge cysts since...

So, life is great!! We have a beautiful daughter who we just adore!!! But there is still more love in our hearts to be shared. It was simple last time, so just give me those Clomid pills again, and I will be a happy camper!!!

Not so easy this time!! Actually, starting October 2007 we were off BCP's and trying naturally since for the first time in my life I was having cycles on my own!! Well, after 8 months of doing that to no-avail, we started back on the Clomid. I am currently on my 9th consecutive Clomid cycle. I am finally consistantly ovulating, but half of the time it is on the right ovary, which has no tube, so it is worthless over there. But still, the Left should work!!! Well, it wasn't, so my OB sent me to see a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE, infertility specialist). I loved my OB, but I also love my RE!!! SO, December 2008, we start seeing Dr. A. He is great!! He did a HSG (google it...LOL!!) and it was all clear (although I felt like it was a form of midevil torture, not a diagnostic test!!). We have done 2 consecutive post-coitial tests (PCT's), both have shown all of the present sperm dead (absolutley NOT normal). But, my husbands semen analysis was "awesome/excellent" (which he is sooooo proud of his "little guys"). So, that is where we stand now. I am going in for my third PCT on Monday, and if it is showing the same, then we will know our diagnosis. It looks like I have a form of female Antisperm Antibodies. That basically means that my immune system sees his sperm as an invador and kills it off!! For us, this will mean more invasive procedures to try to concieve, and the realistic possibility that it may never happen. I pray every day thanking God for our wonderful daughter and pleading with Him for the cance to parent more children.

I think that is enough for now...I will be back for more after my appointment on Monday once I know more, and I may even pop on here to post on some of the other wonderful blogs that I have come across when they have their weekly carnivals!! FUN!!!